The Return
by jdsantos
Summary: Set 10 years later after a major evacuation of the entire population in Wall Sina, Mikasa is forced to abandon Eren and escape outside the walls with the Corporal and the entire town. Over the past years Mikasa becomes distant with Eren and finds herself physically attracted to her superior. Rikasa/Rivamika
1. An Unfinished Letter

**_I love Shingeki No Kyojin and I've been wanting to write a fanfic on it I just didn't know what to write it about. So I opted for Rivaille x Mikasa and I know what I want to happen. The chapter's a bit short but I didn't how to start it so I'll make a long chapter next if anybody even likes this. Lol. So for a little information on the story it's set 10 years later and Eren and Mikasa have been separated; I'm afraid that's all I can give out for now so please enjoy :) x_**

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_Chapter One_

_Dear Eren,_

_The sun rising in the horizon is something that I've wanted to do with you ever since we were little. But instead I got to watch it with the Corporal. I wish I could show you what it's like being free, I wish I could tell you what it's like to wake up in the morning and hear the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks. It's beautiful out here. If only you were here to experience it with me._

_It's been 5 years since we last spoke. Since I last wrote to you. I haven't had the time to get my hands on paper and write. I'm not sure why I decided today was the day I'd write but it felt right. Maybe it was the fact that I get to see you at last, in three days. I haven't seen you in ten years so I don't really know what to expect, I think you hate me for never writing back and I'm sorry._

_I'm burning questions into my head and I don't even know the answer to them. Like, what if you don't even remember me? What if you've suddenly forgoten about me? Hell, I'm unsure myself if you're even alive. I wish I had gotten the chance to stay inside the walls and fight with you but I didn't understand why you wouldn't let me. It was dangerous enough evacuating an entire town outside the walls even Rivaille had second doubts about the plan._

_I've changed Eren. I'm not that girl that everyone used to be pity on because she'd watched her family get murdered. I've grown as a person now. My own individual person. I'm not clingy and over protective of you anymore, I've learnt to let go and put my own faith in you. That's why I'm having faith in God that you're still alive._

* * *

Mikasa's pen hovered above the thin paper. Her hand had frozen. She stared at the huge, empty white space underneath her writing and wondered whether it was worth it to carry on her letter.

Her horse whined for attention and the raven haired girl sighed. She plopped her paper and pen on to the ground, putting a small coarse rock on top so the wind wouldn't blow it away. She approached her horse and began to pet it mildly with her soft, delicate hands. Her horse closed its big, coal eyes and flicked its thick ebony tail.

Mikasa was oblivious to Rivaille's presence behind her. He was reading through her letter with an impassive expression. His forest – green cape was vigorously flying because of the howling wind.

"You spelt 'forgotten' wrong. It's two t's not one." Rivaille corrected and Mikasa jumped out of her day dream almost instantly.

She backed away from the horse feeling a sigh of relief that it wasn't Jean who had read her letter. If it were he would've mocked her and made aggravating sounds to irritate her. At least with the Corporal he wouldn't even give a damn. "Corporal –"She paused for a second to follow Rivaille's beady gaze. He was surprisingly scowling at her horse. "I didn't think you'd come back early so I didn't wash her." She carried on apologetically referring to her horse.

Rivaille removed his gaze from the horse and placed it on to the timid girl stood before him. "Gather everyone together and tell them we're heading back to Wall Sina early. Feed the horses, it'll be a long ride 'til we reach the French border to Germany."

Mikasa blinked and wondered why they were already returning home so early. Could it be that Irwin sent another bird to deliver a message that stated we needed to urgently get home?

Rivaille turned and commenced walking away until Mikasa stopped him in his tracks.

"Corporal?" She called out and the short superior swivelled his body around to the sound of his name.

"Sorry Ackerman but I don't know why we're heading home early. I want to know the answer too but we don't always get what we want. Irwin must be in a predicament if he's asking for our return at this hour." He replied. Mikasa was astounded as to how he knew what she was already thinking. Maybe her aura gave it away or maybe it was that ten years of surviving together had brought them closer and he knew her too well to guess wrong at her words. Rivaille turned his back to the ebony haired girl and continued to walk away. "Wake Jean up when you're on your way down will you?" He asked, though it sounded more like a command rather than a question.

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**It feels too short :( but idk please review!**


	2. Cowards

**Here's the long chapter I promised, thank you for the reviews! :)**

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Chapter Two

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Mikasa unfolded the paper and read Eren's first ever letter to her:

_Dear Mikasa,_

_Irwin told me that you stopped by a place called Austria. He said you'd just crossed the German border so if I wrote to you now it wouldn't take that long for his bird to deliver the message._

_I just wanted to make sure you were okay, that you and everyone else had gotten out safely. But with someone like you and Captain Rivaille leading the town I'm positive that you arrived in no harm's way. I have faith in you both that's why I trust you with my own soul._

_It's odd isn't it? How I can't call your name and you're not here by my side, instead you're thousands of miles away from me. But we'll get used to it. I think I could get used to writing every day now. And Rivaille, I'm worried that_

― "Mikasa are you coming or not?" Jean yelled as he swung his lengthy legs over his handsome, bronze horse. Without a backwards glance the mahogany haired lad had already abandoned Mikasa and merged with the rest of the townsfolk.

She had been too engrossed in reading Eren's letter she had elapsed that they were already setting off to go home.

Pressed for time, she promptly crumpled the paper effortlessly and jostled it into a bag that was knotted onto her saddle and mounted her light weight on her dusky beauty. As her horse wailed, Mikasa hauled at the reigns gesturing for her stallion to embark the journey home. But first, she made a halt at Rivaille's adjacent.

The pair observed as everyone initiated riding their horses out into the open and headed East towards the German – French border. There was a cosmic number of townsfolk, but over the decade their number had diminished by 50% due to the absence of food and adulthood. Some knew they weren't going to pull through, but Mikasa stated that if they wanted to live and return home they would have to fight.

"Who's leading the way?" Mikasa enquired as the horses' hooves trudged against the low cut grassland.

Rivaille retained his eyes on the townsfolk and said, "Sasha and Christa are taking the lead. I positioned Jean and Connie on either side in case any person takes the incorrect course or has the courtesy to escape."

Mikasa creased her eyebrows at her higher companion. "What are _we_ going to do?" She queried.

"We'll take the posterior. Make sure nobody's lagging or getting left behind. We'll make a refuelling stop at Troyes and validate that the horses get a breather before we advance further east to Chaumont; if the horses aren't drained we might even make it to Bar-Le-Duc."

Hearing no answer Rivaille craned his head and Mikasa hastily nodded in understanding. The last group of horses had hurried past them so he speedily followed, his horse whickering in trepidation. She observed as he kept his concentration on the folks in front of him. His only objective is to defend humanity and if he had to perish to protect them he would contentedly do so.

Mikasa daunted at his fortitude and heroism, inquisitive of herself, why did her stomach feel nauseous thinking about the Corporal like that?

Shaking her head at the peculiar question she towed the reigns tighter and her black beauty began to charge, slowly catching up to the Corporal's flank.

* * *

It was irresolute about how much time had passed but everyone distinguished that it must be dawn if the sun was peeking through the skyline. Just no further than 5 am at least.

There was a vast empty space up ahead and with Rivaille's rich eyes he could just about decipher the sign 'Bienvenue à Charmount' which he understood as 'Welcome to Charmount.'

Rivaille fished for his firearm inside his thigh boot and drew it out targeting it towards the right. Without a subsequent uncertainty he pulled the trigger and out exploded a lengthy thread of crimson smoke. All craniums turned in the direction of the smoke and Connie, who understood the indicator, signalled everyone to take a rest.

"Guarantee that everyone's together, double check if you have to." Rivaille yelled to Mikasa who then nodded and teamed up with Jean to varnish the responsibility.

15 minutes later and everyone had settled in speedier than Rivaille had anticipated. A majority of the youngsters were slumbering whilst some of the elders were congregated around a fire consuming food and gossiping to one another.

The colour of graceful petroleum caught the Corporal's courtesy. It was Mikasa. Taking her horse to a proximate oak shrub and securing its reigns around a thick branch.

Debating about whether he should go over and reveal Eren's conditions he compelled himself to drag his body to her. Whether it was to achieve her trust or inhibit her from ever knowing about Eren's state Rivaille knew he would have to speak to her before they returned.

Sloping against the oak shrub he shifted his mass onto the tree and blinked. "Beautiful isn't she?" He called out attributing to Mikasa's onyx stallion.

The girl peered from behind the stallion's opposite with extensive eyes. It was like his existence had traumatised her she couldn't even bring herself to say something. The prevailing figure leaned off the shrub and approached Mikasa, running his hand through the stallion's brawny body. Feeling the suppleness of its coating and the temperateness it discharged from sprinting so far Rivaille felt like he was home. Wherever that was.

"Ackerman why do you always look like I've murdered your cat?" He asked keeping his eyes and hands restrained on the stallion.

Mikasa locked her eyes closed and unrestrained her overwrought shoulders then unlocked her eyes again. She could feel a hot redness emerge from her cheeks, an unhealthy colour of rosy pink appeared. Peculiarly, Mikasa knew precisely why she had been trying to elude him. She was insecure about her feelings, her attention was all over the place right now. The thought of seeing Eren for the first time in 10 years seemed so dreamlike it seemed too good to be true. But it had to be. Otherwise she wouldn't be half way out in the middle of France making her way back to Wall Sina, where she last saw him.

The girl exhaled. "If I told you you'd mock me just like Jean."

"That's Jean. Not me. If I were mocking you I'd need a debateable reason behind it."

She sighed again. "I just feel like something's not right with Eren. Why are we bringing the entire town back when I could just travel by myself? Getting past the titans out the walls was a difficult task can you imagine what it might be like getting back in?"

"10 years have sailed by and our numbers have decreased. We escaped the Titans what makes you think we can't escape them again? Irwin's a clever man, he knows what he's doing don't doubt him."

Rivaille gazed profoundly into Mikasa's obsidian eyes, the sun's vague light smiled into her eyes and for a moment her eyes had a tone of argent in them. "Mhm." She retorted like she understood.

"Your self – deprecating attitude is unhealthy for your reputation. Why do you doubt yourself? Only cowards doubt themselves that's why they lose. If you are worth 100 soldiers to Humanity what are you worth to yourself?" He asked in an imposing tone. Mikasa stared at the Corporal with a blank expression. He really knew how to get to her head and scramble everything up. "Cowards don't travel halfway across a country to see someone who might not even be alive. Cowards don't get the privilege to protect the entire human race." His daunting tone sent a quiver up her spine and made her think about all the sacrifices she's made to protect the ones she loved.

"Cowards don't lie either. Corporal you're the_ only_ person who knows what's going inside the Wall, tell me –" She paused to take a breather but then continued. "Is Eren still alive?"

And in that moment Rivaille's body became rigid, this was the question he'd been wanting to avoid most. Because if he'd told her she'd break down like a weathering rock. Nothing left to keep her motivated, just a few words would be enough to suck the happiness and life of the beautiful girl that stood before him.

Suddenly, something had stopped him dead in his thought. "Ackerman – " He started as his eyebrows knitted together. There was a crimson blotch appearing on the side of her leg. "You're bleeding."

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**hope you liked it :) x **


	3. Possibility

**I promise after this chapter there will be more Rivamika action happening :) x**

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Chapter Three

* * *

"You!" Rivaille barked aiming his finger at a childlike boy meandering about. "Get Christa and tell her to bring the emergency bag." He instructed.

"Y-Yes sir." The boy answered with an alarmed look on his face. Then he sprinted off hunting for Christa.

When he returned Christa was hindering hurriedly behind him with the emergency bag. As soon as she saw Mikasa's bleeding leg Christa began to drain the bag of its contents onto the prairie.

"Mikasa are you okay?" She queried agitatedly but the sable – haired girl did not reply. Instead she tried to seal the wound up with her hands. The blood clot forming in her clothing had spread; it had developed certainly a lot larger and bloodier. "Corporal, help me lie her down." Christa instructed.

Rivaille unquestioningly assisted Christa as they leisurely supported Mikasa down on the steppe. Her stallion wailed stridently and flipped its stumpy, charcoal tail. Maybe it had sensed that her rider was not in moral shape and the only way it could upkeep her was to shake its tail.

"How the hell did you manage to cut yourself in open land?" The Corporal questioned.

Christa somehow managed to tear a part of Mikasa's pants away to examine her wound. Drastically, she began to search for the alcohol bottle and when she did, she cultivated to Mikasa's wound and started to sterilise it. Bemused by the coldness and sudden sharp pain, the injured girl groaned and winced in quick response as the alcohol devoured her cut.

The blonde's eyes averted to Mikasa and she scrunched her face. "Sorry," Christa hand-picked up a sterile, white wipe then smoothly polished Mikasa's pitiable leg. "How did you manage to wound yourself?" She repeated.

Mikasa exhaled a huge groan of liberation, feeling like a vast heaviness had been fortunately elevated off of her shoulders. "I got tired. My eyes – I couldn't keep them and I accidentally steered my horse into a low branch." Lately, she had been feeling a little queasy, more exhausted than she frequently was. Never in 10 years had she ever felt so drained and shattered, the entire feeling of just wanting to faint and not ever wake up gratified her. What if she could just do that? Never wake up and never concern ever again? Mikasa shoved the unhealthy thought away. "But I was quick enough to steer it back properly though." She continued, the questions sitting in the back of her mind.

The wind howled like a lone wolf on a dusky, melancholy night. It echoed in the trio's ears and sent a bleak shudder cascading down each of their spines. Silence plunged upon them and the girls' hairs wavered like sleek, silky cloths absent in the wind's breeze.

"You're a fool Ackerman." Rivaille spoke.

Christa rummaged through the contents apprehensively. Her eyes widened and when they did, she unexpectedly cursed out loud. "Crap. The bandages. The last person I bandaged up was the boy who came looking for me, and that was the last one." The panic-stricken blonde averted her eyes from the contents and searched up and down for a spare cloth to replace the bandage. When her eyes passed over Mikasa they came back and stopped snappishly at the cherry – red piece of fabric perching silently around her petite neck. "Mikasa – " She started but knowing how much that scarf meant to Mikasa, Christa pushed the idea from her head. "You know what? Never mind." The blonde stuttered.

Mikasa unwrapped the crimson scarf from around her neck and handed it to Christa. "Just take it." The ebony girl insisted. Reluctant of Mikasa's action Christa takes the fabric and securely loops it around the girl's wound.

Distant shouting suddenly occurred and second by second additional people got involved and they all began to argue. The trio all turned their heads at the scene simultaneously. "Corporal go." Mikasa insisted.

Rivaille shook his head in refusal. "I want to stay here." He believed maybe now would be the time to tell her about Eren. If only he wasn't so fearful to hurt her mental state. Needless to say he was unconfident himself why he was so anxious about Mikasa, they'd spent an entire 10 years enduring together what altered their relationship all of a sudden?

Rivaille didn't want to say it, he was too troubled to say it.

When Christa caught that Rivaille did not want to sort the senseless quarrel out, she glimpsed up for a second at her superior, and then to her friend. They were both too engrossed with the crowd they didn't notice Christa's uncanny look.

_Does Corporal have a soft spot for her?_ She thought.

Gently, she patted Mikasa's wound. "There. It shouldn't hurt, by the time we get home it will have healed a bit. Just try not to put too much pressure on the leg and – try not to fall asleep on your horse." She advised before beaming a smile at her friend then gathered the contents back into the bag and exited swiftly.

The raven – haired girl waited until Christa was out of eyesight before desperately asking, "Corporal —" Mikasa began, she bit bitterly into the inside of her cracked lips. "Please…Is Eren still alive?"

_Damn it Mikasa._ He thought.

Even if there were a billion other things to talk about Mikasa was too persevering to let the subject of Eren go. She necessitated to know about Eren and she demanded it in the politest way possible which made Rivaille even more anxious.

In Mikasa's eyes there was no world in the universe, no matter how many dimensions if Eren was not in it.

But who could blame the girl? She hasn't seen her only family for an entire decade, obviously if that were Rivaille he'd want to, to a great extent, know if his family were alive too.

With no other choice other than to wait for the right time Rivaille sighed and tentatively said, "He's excited to see you."

* * *

Later on that evening the quarrel had been sorted out, everyone was gathering around a campfire to keep themselves warm. A majority of the townsfolk were slumbering soundly or greedily devouring on the food provided.

On the other side of the so-called 'camp' Jean, Connie and the Corporal were congregated around a miniature fire they had created for themselves and discussed plans for the next expedition to the following destination.

"If we leave at midnight we'll arrive at Bar-le-Duc in the morning, then we can set off to the French border in the evening." Jean offered.

Over the years Jean had become keener, not because Christa had taught him some factual things but as a person he became more sovereign. He became self – motivated and he constantly relishes riding on his horse to anywhere where he can find exposed land. Although, there might be an occasion where Jean would fall into a cavernous slumber and won't wake up until several hours later. The guy simply rides until he tires himself out.

Connie on the other hand, was still the same, witty and out – going kid he was. He'd never actually grown up, maybe just physically but mentally? He was still the entertainer, the one to make everyone sneer or giggle. The joker.

Connie added with confidence, "By the time we reach the border it will be morning. We can probably stop for a couple minutes to nourish the horses then maybe head to the Rhineland by evening." He took a sip of water and gulped it down smoothly. "At least we know we're close to Germany if we're in the Rhineland."

The group leader was about to step in to respond to Connie's contribution but Jean got there before him. "Wait — I just want to ask one question, which I'm sure we're all desperate to know the answer to." His eyes glanced over to Rivaille who only blinked.

"Shoot."

"Why did we leave so early? Is Commander Irwin _that_ frantic to see us?" Jean asked.

Rivaille sighed deeply and exchanged looks with the duo in sat in front of him. "Irwin – he's – he's in a predicament."

Connie's eyes widened, "What kind of predicament makes us leave so early?"

The Corporal took a short pause debating in his mind whether he was going to truthfully answer. Unfortunately he made a mistake and accidentally thought out loud. "Eren."

"What do you mean, 'Eren'?" Jean added.

Rivaille exhaled again, not exactly sure how he was going to break it to them. On the Brightside at least it wasn't Mikasa he had to say it to. "Eren's in a coma and there's a possibility that he might die or might be dead."

Both their faces hadn't stimulated a single muscle. They were both just frozen like a pair of appealing ice statues. "What – " Jean started but couldn't find the determination to carry on. Even though he was the one who had numerous wretched arguments with Eren he did care about him because at one point Jean favoured Mikasa.

"Irwin and Armin devised a plan to take on Annie in Eren's Titan form but he somehow was incompetent to change despite his newly accumulated skill to shift just by the thought of shifting. Because of this Annie condemned him. When they took him into Hanji's care she told them that a few broken bones weren't healing at all and he wasn't responding." The Corporal groaned and shut his eyes. "I won't say it again so I ask a favour that you do **not** speak a word of it to Mikasa. She doesn't know yet and I intend to keep it that way 'til the time is right." He pleaded in a monotone.

When the superior re-opened his eyes he witness Connie changing his glance to something or someone behind him. Rivaille trailed Connie's gaze and was dazed to see Mikasa standing there like a lost puppy looking insipid and nauseating. For a moment he thought his heart had stopped beating.

"E-Eren, he's —" She stuttered. "He – He's de-de?" She was incapable of finishing her sentence but everyone knew what she was intending to say. Without a backwards glance she seized the nearest stallion, mounted onto it and heaved its reigns sadistically. The stallion jumped back in distress and hurriedly careered away wailing, waking the snoozing folks up unintentionally.

"Mikasa wait!" Rivaille yelled after her but she was already too distant away to hear her superior's explanation. "Damn it." And he cursed to himself whilst ascending his weight onto a close stallion nearby.

The Corporal looked over to a man who jumped up from his slumber, terrified of what was happening. "What the _hell_ is going on?" The man roared, angry that he had been awoken by a terrifying noise.

"Corporal –"Connie shouted but was stopped midway through his sentence.

"I want you to tell Sasha and Christa to get everyone on their horses and start setting off as quickly as possible. We have to stay together, we can't afford to lose any more than we already have so attempt to catch up. Christa – she has a bag with a map in, find it and follow it east to Bar-le-Duc. Scrap the plan, it looks like we're going home earlier than we expected. I'm putting you in charge now." Rivaille instructed quickly, almost too quick that Jean didn't even hear a single word the Corporal had said. Jean felt a little privileged to be put in charge, he was going to take the responsibility seriously if two of the strongest soldiers were leaving him a duty to fulfil.

Rivaille hauled the reigns rapidly and the horse jerked the ground with its thick, metal hoof, setting off to chase after Mikasa.

"Wait, Corporal—"

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**I'm not too keen on if you liked this chapter, I'm not entirely happy with this but I had to update :) thank you for the reviews again, you all make me very very happy 3 x**


	4. The Mourning After

**Sorry I didn't update, I was busy. I'll try and post a new chapter every week if I'm not lazy or busy. :) Oh and for the sake of this fanfic can we all pretend that Rivaille is taller than Mikasa? **

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**Chapter Four**

* * *

_Damn it Mikasa slow down, she's getting tired._ Rivaille thought to himself referring to the ebony haired girl's stallion.

He was compelling his horse to continue striding even though it had been several hours that the pair had been trailing after Mikasa. Rivaille knew this would happen, but the foulest part of it all was that he broke it to her in the most awful, conceivable way he could ever envision. To know that Rivaille had told someone else before Mikasa would have been tear-jerking to hear. Rivaille felt a sudden rush of prodigious emotions indulge him. His chest was beginning to ache and his heart thumped a little faster than normal. He wondered if this was what it felt like to have the guilt eat away inside you.

Then as if by unfortunate luck Mikasa's horse faltered and Mikasa was flung a far distance away from her companion. Rivaille watched as she rolled endlessly away from her horse, until she enforced herself to halt before grumbling in agony. The Corporal enlarged his eyes immediately then he pulled his reigns to signal his horse to speedily stride to his inferior.

"Mikasa!" He yelled in a concerned tone, his eyebrows knitting together.

When he reached her wounded stallion he leaped off his own and raced towards Mikasa, who was sluggishly hauling herself off the ground. Rivaille noticed that she was luckily not injured and sighed in relief.

"Are you alright?" He asked her and she pivoted her body so that she wasn't fronting him. He could catch her inaudible snivelling. She took a big bottomless breath before rotating around to face him.

"Eren's not dead, he can't be dead." She told him through her cries.

She struggled to run away but Rivaille managed to clutch her wrist firmly, in time. To which she only wept more before she began to hit his chest with her weak fists, repeatedly in rage. She eventually got weary and stopped her violent gesture. She snuffled and relaxed her head alongside his chest. Rivaille's idle, thumping heart was the only thing that Mikasa needed to hear to make her feel tranquil and serene. Bewildered by Mikasa's affectionate gesture Rivaille flickered an eyelid and unhurriedly encompassed his sturdy, virile arms around his inferior. Never in a long time had he ever enfolded such a dejected person. The only people or thing he ever embraced before he joined the Scouting Legion was his knees, because in those streets, everybody identified who he was except nobody offered to be his friend. They would make him feel so secluded and desolate. As if the whole world was against him in that exact moment.

"He's not dead." Rivaille repeated, trying to bolster Mikasa with his croaky yet lenient voice.

Rivaille's mare whinnied to grasp his attention. He drew away from Mikasa and approached her damaged stallion with a calculating gaze. She was unobtrusive but he knew, just by beholding into those large, petroleum – coloured eyes that she was suffering from a broken leg.

He could hear Mikasa's dainty footsteps approach from behind him. "Is she going to be alright?" She asked apprehensively, kneeling down and caressing her stallion sympathetically. It sounded as if she hadn't even been crying, she was hasty to tweak herself together and return to her standard demeanour. It was patently peculiar but after spending a decade with Mikasa, Rivaille was already used to this.

"A broken leg won't do either of us anything." He answered in a mutter.

Mikasa didn't glance up, she only continued to caress her suffering companion affectionately. "What do we do?"

Rivaille blinked, forcing the answer to withdraw from his mouth. "Eradicating her is the only option we have."

Hearing his reply she stopped caressing brusquely and glanced up at the vista ahead. Even though she was afraid to confess the truth, the only way to put her stallion out of its desolation was to kill it. They weren't going to get anywhere if they brought a stallion with a fragmented leg with them. Mikasa hoisted up, facing the Corporal with an impassive expression and nodded in understanding.

"If it's not too much to ask Corporal, I don't want to do it." Mikasa told him. "It wouldn't feel right if I did it." Rivaille nodded. The raven haired girl knelt down again and planted a soft, gentle kiss on her stallion's muzzle.

The sky was promptly changing and the clouds were travelling away, becoming overcast silhouettes in the melancholy evening sky. The atmosphere became soundless and the wind was humming soundlessly and cordially. The Corporal's mare was scraping against the moist grass, its hooves filling up with dirt. There was a repugnant smell that loitered in the air and the disturbing sound of a stallion's last wail led a tremor down Mikasa's spine. The sun had lost its illumination and the smell of death surrounded her stallion's carcass.

* * *

Later on that evening Rivaille and Mikasa were congregated around a miniature fire. The pair hadn't mumbled a word since the incident of earlier. They had witnessed death countless times before, why was this one so diverse? The fire hissed and Mikasa watched the flames dance with flamboyance. Soon enough, one of them was bound to disrupt the stillness. Rivaille's mare whinnied in exhaustion and Mikasa was still wondering about Eren.

"You should stop worrying." Rivaille told her as he prodded the thick branches in the fire with his sword.

Mikasa sighed and hugged her knees, her stomach felt like a quarry of desolation. "I feel so miserable and all I can do is…feel it." She replied to him, her eyes drooping with grief.

Rivaille exchanged his gaze over to her, uncertain of exactly what to say back. "Why is he so special to you?" He asked.

Mikasa dropped her chin onto her knees and frowned. "He saved me." She simply replied. "We have nobody but each other and because he saved me, I feel like I have to repay him the favour."

Rivaille prodded the fire again. "So he never meant anything more than just a brother? Or a bestfriend?" He asked, although he was unsure himself why he was so intrigued to know what Eren meant to her. As long as he could remember, Mikasa was just a partner he had to tolerate for a decade, nothing more.

Mikasa skimmed her eyes over to him with an interested look on her face. "Why do you care?"

He creased his eyebrows. "I've spent 10 years with you. I know that you get irritated easily, you never eat, you are constantly wanting to be alone, whenever you get angry there's a little vein in your forehead that pops up. And yet, I don't know anything about you."

She shrugged her slouched shoulders. "There's nothing to tell." She paused for a brief moment, calculating in her mind what to say next. "Eren's basically the only thing that summarises my entire existence."

"But it's different now. You have to let the past go." He thought out loud by accident.

"Yeah, but it won't let _me_ go."

The fire crackled again but this time the dancing flames had disappeared. The night was creeping around the corner and they had to set off soon. It suddenly began to get cold and Rivaille was debating whether he could hear a large herd of horses from a mile away.

He stood up and reached his hand out to Mikasa. Her eyes followed his skinny fingers and eventually they met with his piercing, argent orbs.

"We better get going." He insisted.

Mikasa grabbed his hand and the aloofness of both their hands kindled something between them. It was like a lightning bolt had crash into them both and they were suddenly confused about who the other was. The skin on Mikasa's neck arose and she couldn't help but feel an unhealthy shade of pink appear on her prominent cheeks.

Rivaille helped her up and he immediately turned his back on her, knotting some of her bags to his mare's saddle.

"I'll take the front so you can rest your head against me if you fall asleep." He told her as he mounted his muscular weight onto the mare. He reached his hand out to her again to help her support herself as she ascended onto the horse. The touch of her bleak skin made Rivaille's body rigid and he was so tangled up about his feelings he almost didn't want to be with Mikasa. Even though it had been several years he was still wordlessly mourning over Petra. He wondered whether he was ever going to move on and start from a new page.

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**I know it's a bit short but I needed to update. I'm not entirely happy with this chapter because I've had exams and I feel like my head is fried so please bare with me whilst I get my brain functioning properly. :) x**


	5. The Patience Test

**hellooo everyone :)**

* * *

Chapter Five

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A day and a half had passed. The townsfolk, or at least what was left of the townsfolk had caught up with Rivaille and Mikasa. They had accomplished to cross the Rhineland into the German border and were now within Wall Maria. Or...what was now Wall Maria.

The entire wall was encompassed with abundant Titans dawdling about. None of them even stopped to take a guise at the intruders who hadn't seen this place since 10 years ago. They were disinterested, saturnine and just oblivious to the fact that a vast group of humans had entered their terrain.

"What happened here?" Christa asked.

Rivaille was inquisitive to find out himself but he knew that there were more essential things to get done. "That doesn't matter right now. We can use this as an advantage, if they don't attack we'll probably reach Wall Sina tomorrow." Resting behind him was a slumbering girl, her arms were enveloped around his waist so that she could hold herself upright.

Christa nodded and understood why it didn't matter. "Yes sir."

* * *

Wall Rose wasn't any different either. There were plentiful Titans meandering the place, oblivious to them too. Needless to say, it was dreadfully quiet. Too quiet in fact, that it was disturbing to even stay for a minute longer in Wall Rose.

Jean was balancing on his murky horse, squinting his eyes at a faraway distance. Something was grasping his attention. "Corporal I think I see the entrance to Wall Sina." He self-proclaimed out loud.

Mikasa overheard and peeped her head from above Rivaille's shoulder. She'd been napping the entire journey to Wall Maria. It was certainly odd, especially since it was coming from her. When they had got through into Wall Rose she'd eventually woke up and forced herself to nippily familiarize with her surroundings.

"Eren." She assumed aloud, her eyes broadening with impatience as her arms lay swathed around her superior's abdomen.

Rivaille yanked at his reins and his divine mare whickered. It thrust at the ground sending a mass of grass from behind, then he careered away heading en route for the entrance. The others following behind submissively.

As soon as they had reached the ingress Rivaille waited for someone to discharge the gate open and welcome them home. A soldier from above, perching on top of the wall detected them and gave orders to open the gate immediately. It grumbled open and what they were greeted with was not a blissful welcome. Rather more than a disturbing welcome.

The houses and buildings had been crumpled, smoke was haunting the air, anywhere and everywhere. It was soundless but not like Wall Rose, there was an unnatural feel in the atmosphere, of Death. Not only did it have the bitter smell of Death but on the ground there was literally _Death._ Amassed in fours were incalculable bodies of soldiers bound in linen fabric. Some of them were even tainted in blood. Some dry, some wet which meant there had been a current battle.

Rivaille eavesdropped as the people behind him gasped in revulsion at the unfriendly sight. He'd witnessed this before and it was something he certainly did not want to reminisce. Though something plucked him at the back of his mind.

_How long had these bodies been here? There are so many it's difficult to calculate that they've been lying here for a certain amount of time. They could've been here for an entire decade. _

Suddenly from out of nowhere loomed a full-fledged Armin and a thrilled Ymir. They arrived on their stallions and there was a hulk smirk that spread across Ymir's speckled face. At last she could finally clasp the only person she had been waiting to clasp. An entire era more and Ymir thought she might perish without seeing the fair-haired goddess again.

"Ymir!" Christa yelled with exhilaration. She instantaneously hurdled off her horse and sprinted to her treasured one. Ymir did the same and the two were unified once again. Christa loped into her arms like a missing puppy and grinned. "It's so good to see you again."

Ymir reverted the smile and brushed her fingers through Christa's blonde ringlets. She noticed it had grown at least a few inches. "Christa, your hair –"

The straw-coloured girl hauled away as a shade of rose appeared on her prominent cheeks. "I know."

On the other hand Mikasa hopped off Rivaille's mare and sprinted to Armin. Not like Christa did but in a more understated and urbane way. The long-time best friends glowered at each other and picked out all the differences they noticed in each other since the last time they saw one another. Nonetheless Mikasa was so contented to see Armin again she couldn't comprehend her delight and heaved Armin into her embrace. Enfolding him to death.

"It's nice to see you too Mikasa." Armin pondered and Mikasa giggled. They pulled apart and he skimmed her now lengthy, unctuous black hair. "The last time I saw you with long hair was when we first joined the Scouting Legion. But that was before –"

"Before Eren told me to cut it." Mikasa completed.

"Yeah."

The mere thought of Eren prompted Mikasa of the unpredicted news. "Is he okay?"

Armin didn't want to enlighten Eren's conditions in case Mikasa threw a fit and started to quest for him like an irrational person. Providentially, Jean approached at the precise time to welcome his friend.

"Jean?" Armin chortled and the two embraced, though in a macho way.

"Blondie you grew!" Jean exclaimed. 'Blondie' was the nickname he gave to Armin because of the colour of his hair. Whereas Jean was mainly renowned as 'Horse Face' to almost everyone. "And your hair is-is tied up!"

"And _you_ still look like a horse." Armin clowned and Jean punched him in the arm.

"Armin, Ymir. Where's Irwin?" Rivaille interjected, unamused.

Ymir and Armin swapped looks and before they knew it they were guiding the entire group back to Headquarters, which was also known as the Church. Ymir and Christa volunteered to handle the townsfolk together, tried to keep them tranquil and make them feel like they were at home. Or at least, what was left of it. Connie and Sasha helped too but they were mostly engaged in arm wrestling and food competitions between the two.

Armin directed Rivaille, Mikasa and Jean to Irwin's mini-office. He knocked rhythmically on the door before it whined open to a dismal–looking Commander half dressed.

"Uh – Commander," Armin looked away and Jean shortly followed. Mikasa gasped at the unforeseen sight of his abs then ultimately shed her eyes away from it. "You said to send them here when they came."

Rivaille blinked and balled his fists at the prospect of his partner. He still looked the same he did ten years ago. Except he hadn't grew, instead Rivaille did and now he was almost the same height; though not as brawny built as Irwin was.

"I'm busy Arlert." He insisted and tried to shut the door but Rivaille jammed it with his boot.

He broke the door open and punched Irwin pitilessly in the face. Irwin staggered back on his table top and his arm brushed a couple bottles of beer to the floor. They shattered in unison. "You bring the entire town here on a very solemn note and now you're _'busy'_?" He barked at him, Irwin touched his jaw and grimaced at the pain he'd received. "We didn't come back to play the Patience Test Irwin, we came back because _you_ said Eren was in concern to you."

Irwin snickered and attempted to keep his poise in control. "_We?_ The last time I checked Rivaille you didn't rely on in 'We' there was only ever _you._"

"That was 10 years ago. A lot can happen in 10 years." Rivaille garrisoned himself.

There was an uncanny sneer that arose from the corners of his mouth. "A lot certainly can Corporal."

Mikasa strode forward into his office, her eyes still peeled away from Irwin. "Commander, you said Eren was in a critical state, is there any way I can see him?" She asked daringly.

Irwin exchanged his glance onto Mikasa. He saw her tighten her jaw, then went to put a shirt on. Although he was covered the shirt still outlined the rigidity in his abs. "If you can manage to keep your hands off him then I'll take you to him." Mikasa nodded unwillingly. She knew she wanted to hug him, keep him in her arms forever but if that's what the Commander wanted she would unwillingly do so.

Irwin led the four away to wherever it was they were heading to. They turned this way and that, stopped once because Irwin desired a drink then continued. Rivaille elected to follow from the back whilst Mikasa remained at the front.

They eventually reached their destination and Irwin unbolted the door to a room that felt familiar to Mikasa. Irwin and Rivaille quarantined themselves away and calmly solved their vehement introduction from earlier into an ordinary and more hospitable one. However if Mikasa could remember rightly, this was the same room that Eren was placed in when they'd managed to evoke him from Annie's Titan form. Of course with the help of Rivaille, Mikasa is still grateful to him even to this day. She was about to stride in, ready to see his precarious state, when a constricted grip surrounded her diminutive wrist.

She craned her head and noticed Rivaille glaring at her angrily and Irwin was having a secluded chat with Armin. "Meet me in Irwin's office."

"Why?" She wondered her eyebrows creasing.

"It's nothing important." Mikasa understood so she nodded. Though Rivaille still had his grasp around her wrist. "Don't touch the kid. He's undoubtedly still in depraved conditions after all he's been like that for a week now."

"W-What?"

Nonetheless by the time she wanted Rivaille to echo what he said, he was already gone. Disappeared into thin air. Without a backwards glance or even a goodbye.

_Had Eren really been like this for a week? So that would mean Irwin had called them home for an entirely different purpose. _Mikasa thought.

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**Sooo...I'm sorry I haven't updated in such a long while but I was busy. And, I mean ****_extremely_**** busy. I hope you forgive me and to reassure you I'm not abandoning this story. Ever. Please review it would make me happy because I'm really ill today :( but I hope you enjoyed x**


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